You’re engaged! Congratulations! This is such an exciting time and yet it can quickly become overwhelming as the questions come flooding in- “When is the wedding? Where will it be? Can I have a plus one?” Whether you’ve had your dream wedding planned in your head since you were six years old or this is the first time you’ve had to think about it, it can feel so overwhelming to feel like so many eyes are on you, waiting for you to make decisions. But don’t worry! I’ve been in the wedding industry for 13 years so I’ve got some pointers for you to help make it easier!

Define what’s important for you

Before you start with any planning I suggest sitting down with your partner and talking through your absolutes. If nothing else, what is the one thing you want from your wedding day/the thing you will be sad to miss. For my wedding I said the photos were the big thing I cared about and my husband, the most extroverted person on the planet, wanted a giant dance party with as many friends there as possible (out went my idea of a small, mountainside wedding). Maybe for you it’s going to a place neither of you have ever been (or returning to a place you love). Maybe it’s having your ceremony with fall colors as a backdrop. Define what matters to you and build the rest of the day(s) around that.

Get an idea of when you want to get married

Choose a general time you want to get married. You don’t have to pick your exact date just yet but knowing a general time (ie Fall 2024) will allow you to start nailing down some details. When it comes to choosing vendors or venues (if you choose to go that route) you’ll need at least that much.

Book Your Photographer

Choose your photographer! Wedding photographers are often booked a year or more out so you want to find someone you connect with early on in your planning. It’s a bonus if you find someone before you have a ton of other details planned- your original date might already be booked but the photographer may have another day close by that is available. If you’re booking a venue these may be the two schedules that are most difficult to coordinate which is why you want to get this squared away at the very beginning.

Pick a date and location

Once you’ve met your perfect match for a photographer (It’s me, hi!) you will want to work together to choose a date and location.

Choose your outfits

This is the fun part! Choosing what you want to wear for your wedding day can be as fun or stressful as you make it. I always recommend something you’ll be comfortable moving in so you’re not dying to get out of it all day. Depending on where you order your dress from it can take quite a while for it to come in so you’ll want to get on this as soon as possible to make sure it arrives in time and allow for alterations if needed.

Book your other vendors

I want to be clear that I’m in no way saying that other vendors aren’t important and that’s why they’re at the end of this list. The people in the wedding industry pour so much of themselves into their work and sacrifice so much of their time to be there for you. The reason I don’t have them as the first thing you do is because who you book depends on what type of day you’re having. If you’re having an intimate ceremony with just the two of you on a mountaintop then you probably don’t need a DJ, but maybe you want to hire a helicopter to bring you there. You could have someone make your gorgeous bouquet and flower arrangements for your ceremony or you could want to skip the flowers in exchange for hiking poles. There are so many options for your wedding and you want to make sure you’re hiring exactly what you need to make your vision of the best day ever come to life.

This is not meant to be an all inclusive list but it hits on the big expense/more time sensitive parts of your wedding. The biggest thing I would encourage is to keep it fun! This is an exciting day and you get to choose where your time, energy and money go to make it your dream day. For some that really is a big, traditional wedding with a giant dance party with as many friends as possible, and for some that means throwing out expectations and doing something out of the box that is unique and meaningful to just you. Want ideas of unique things to include in your wedding day? I’d love to grab a cup of coffee and help plan your perfect day!